And we're back.... well SHW had a small house event this past week. We didn't really draw a crowd
but there were some exciting matches to be had regardless.
Before I get goin on the event I need to bring up something real quick, Havoc is a damn pussy, he'd
rather sit on his chunky ass than wrestle anymore, so fuck him right in his fucking ass.
Ok, the opener was an old classic, Gerhardt vs. Plenske. Now I personally would've loved it if
both of them had lost but that's not how matches work...wow. Anyways Gerhardt got schooled after failing a stunner attempt
and Plenske got the win. Due to the controversal ending in the "Loser Wears a Dress" match, newcomer Dustin Thacker squared
off against Jim "the Grown-Ass Man" Johnson, it was quite an interseting bout to say the least but things came apart for Jim
when Lil Steve threw away his "Aternative Warhammer" and allowed Thacker to choke him out with the Dragonsleeper of sorts.
Later in the day Thacker also choked out Ian with the same move. It's all well and good that the kid is getting off to a good
start but he better remember his place, he won't be able to make a wrestler of my caliber succumb to such a move very easily.
Now Massey and I had a match as well that day, and I'm not gunna lie to you, I lost, but that doesn't
really matter because for one, it was a non-title match and there was no crowd there. Not that any of the fine members of
the audience even deserve to see me in action, but I come up big in the main events and that is a scientific fact. No Massey
has done little but talk shit on me in his previous columns so I think that there has to be a reason why he's so threatened
by me. I thought it over and compiled a nice list of reasons why I am better than Massey and why he should feel threatened:
1. He hasn't been able to make me tap out in the past two and one-half years, whereas I have made every member of SHW
submit to the Ankle Lock.
2.I have held the Backyard Championship three times, he's just only now on his second reign (don't worry he'll lose it
and be back trying for it soon enough).
3. I look better with long hair than Massey ever did.
4. I can always outdrink him at parties.
5. My girlfriend has bigger boobs than any ladies he's had.
Well, I could go on but I don't feel like siiting here the rest of the afternoon. Now onto the upcoming festivities,
there is heretell around the SHW lockerroom that the impending Survival Match is gunna be a little different from the last
one, how? well, you'll just have to wait and see like the rest of us. But with the team of H-Pac and Plenske no longer existing
(H-Pac no longer being in the country, haha...deported) I think that I'll have no problem outlasting the competition just
like how I can last a lot longer in the sack than Massey, oh another one. Well that's all for now, As always........ well
I don't really have a parting saying.
Triple R
